201905 Taipei_Day2

201905 Taipei_Day2

 

Route: Shilin District -> Taipei Main Station -> 九份 (Jiufen) -> 十份 (Shifen) -> Taipei

 

Today, I went to two most classic tourist locations in Taipei – Jiufen and Shifen.

 

If you are ever interested in visiting these places, there are a couple of things you have to be aware of.

 

First, they are not actually in the city of Taipei; all of these places are parts of a suburb called Xinbei (新北 – New Taipei City).

Second, they are not very close to each other so if you were to visit both places, you need to make sure that you have the full day.

Third, while things are fairly cheap there, almost all places ONLY accept cash. This seems to be a norm in Taiwan in general, but there were quite a lot of places that accepted credit card in Taipei. Thus, make sure you have enough cash to enjoy the culture of those two marvelous towns.

 

Good. Now that you are aware of what to keep in mind before visiting these places, let me walk you through my journey to nature.

 

My Taiwanese friend aka my local guide, Janice and I took the bus 1062 in front of MRT Zhongxiao Fuxing Station and got off at Jiufen station. It took about an hour and a half for us to get to Jiufen, BUT the scenery on the way to the top of the mountain was truly mind-blowing.

Personally, walking through the Jiufen market felt like going back to the past, because everything seemed more analogue than what I’m used to. You see, Korea is one of the most technologically developed countries in the world. Thus, a lot of things are very convenient and fast. However, I’ve realized that convenience is not always a blessing. Because I live in this technology filled world, I prefer doing everything using technology – chatting, ordering clothes, paying bills, etc. As a result, nowadays, I occasionally feel weird interacting with people in person. Sometimes, if I’m out meeting someone, I’m thinking to myself wishing that I could go back home and watch the Youtube video that I missed. Simultaneously, sometimes I wonder if I’ll ever get out of this technology-filled prison. Gah, I’m weird.

After we walked around the street a bit, we went to a tea shop where we could see the view of Jiufen from the top. It was a bit foggy and rainy right when we got there, but later on, it cleared up. When it was foggy and misty, I felt like Jiufen was trying to get prepared to show something wonderful to us, like a woman who was getting ready behind the curtain for a date night with her beau. Well, when the “lady” got out of the curtain, the “beau” was truly amazed by her look.

 

 

And the cat that was staring at me like it was about to kill me made my visit to Jiufen even better. Thankfully it didn’t actually kill me – maybe that’s how I am writing the post right now.

十份

十份 waterpark

 

After our adventure in Jiufen, we took the bus 1062 to take a train to Shifen / Pingxi at Ruifang MRT station. The train from Ruifang to Shifen took us about 1 hour. To be honest, I was surprised to find how far it was to get from Jiufen to Shifen. I, for some reason, assumed that the distance between Jiufen and Shifen would be pretty short. Maybe because jiu (九 – 9 in Chinese) is the number after shi (十 – 10 in Chinese)？

Well, either way that was a pathetic guess.

 

Once we arrived at Shifen station, there were a lot of tourists flying lanterns and taking pictures to make memories. Before flying the lantern, we walked away from the main station to go to the waterfall park. Little did I know that it was where I got a lot of gorgeous photos of Taiwanese nature.

 

While you can experience the Taiwanese greenery anywhere in Taiwan, the ASMR of the waterfall was something exclusive to here. I’m sure there are other waterfall parks in Taiwan, but it probably wouldn’t be the same as the one in Shifen. Moreover, the mistiness intensified the vibe in general and made the whole stroll more enjoyable. Most importantly, the weather and the mood made reflection almost automatic, and through my stroll here I was able to get a lot of reflection done and let a lot of grudges or mental trashes go.

After a nice, peaceful walk at the waterfall, we came back to the station to fly the lantern. Apparently, you were supposed to write your wishes on the lantern. As someone who strives to be different, I instead wrote “Buy one get one free, Free Shipping, Super Sales” in Chinese, also thanks to my dear Taiwanese friend.

Bye bye, lantern~~

 

Once we finished flying the lantern, we went back to Taipei and ate dinner.

There, my 2^nd day in Taiwan ended.

 

As usual, by the time I got back home my legs were hurting like crazy. But the workouts, memories, and reflections were all worth the temporary pain. Obviously, there are a lot of things I discovered about myself through this trip, but I’ve been constantly reminded of the healing power of nature. I guess it’s because we belong to nature, not to the technology. So if you feel exhausted both mentally and physically, why don’t you take some time and just soak yourself in the vibe that nature offers?

 

The Road Not Taken by Robert Frost

Back in the high school days, English used to be my worst class. Although I liked learning languages, I never liked English. Well, it’s more like I used to hate English literature. You see, I’m a very visual person so anything that I cannot visualize does not stick in my head. To me, any type of literature (even Korean) was something that I cannot visualize. I mean, how am I supposed to exactly know what an author in the 18^th century was thinking when writing a certain story or poem? I’m not a contemporary of the author.

In April, I turned 25. Now that I’ve been in a professional world and reached my mid-20s, I’ve become very introspective about my life in general. I genuinely want to be a better person, but in order to move forward, I needed to make peace with some of my darkness from the past. I don’t exactly recall how this poem occurred to me, but when I was listening to music on a bus, the poem popped up in my brain out of the blue. Suddenly. More vividly, the title “THE ROAD NOT TAKEN” was literally popping up in my brain like it was a scene from some old movie. I remember, though, that during that time I was down from regret, discouragement, and confusion. Wow, what timing, right? Well, since the poem popped up in my mind, I decided to read the poem and process it myself through reading, researching the meaning behind the poem and finally creating the image you see on top of this post.

 

In this poem, Frost mourns the fact that he had to only choose one way in his life. Because the path he has walked had a lot of difficulties and frustrations, he wonders whether things would have been different if he had walked another path. But then he realizes that he is who he is because of the path he has passed so far. The poem has a lot of complex messages, but the message that spoke the loudest to me was “Carpe Diem – Seize the Day”.

 

When I was in high school and college, I used to live the past or the future, feeling anxious about what I cannot control. I still remember that when I was a senior in high school, I had this 4-year college plan that turned out to be the most useless thing I’ve ever made. In fact, back in the days if something doesn’t go according to my plan, I used to get really depressed. “Why doesn’t life work as I expected? Why are there so many variables that stop me from doing what I planned?” Honestly, there have been a lot of things that I never thought would happen to me. Going to UT, minoring in Chemistry and taking OChem I & II (lol), interning in China and Argentina, and moving back permanently to Korea. As I took time to look back my past, I realized that nothing happened as I planned. Simultaneously, I found that life will never go on as I planned. Therefore, this poem was a good reminder to stay grounded to the present and focus what is given to me. Like a train, the same thing may recur in your life but in a different time. You cannot clock the time back – there is simply no way to do so. Things will not be the same and you will not be the same even though the situation may be similar or the same to what you’ve experienced before. Therefore, I used the picture of a railroad in Taiwan that I took to visually express my reflection toward this poem. Whenever I lose focus and start to worry about future or past again, I’m going to come back to this image to ground myself and tie myself back to the message of this poem – carpe diem.

 

If you are a recruiter and ever want to ask me “What is your plan in 5 years or 10 years?”, here is the answer: I learned that life is filled with uncontrollable variables, and I get discouraged when things don’t happen as I plan. In addition, it occurred to me that planning ahead pushes me away from living the moment, which leads to more regret in the future. Therefore, I don’t plan that far ahead. However, one thing I can tell you for sure is that I will do something global that connects people and culture, using the language skills and cultural intelligence I’ve built through my global experience.

 

By the way, I discovered, through this experience, that classic literature or poem is like an aged cheese. It smells bad(?), but once you try it, it’s so significant that you will remember the taste later on. Once you know how to enjoy it, you can’t get out of it. What do you think? Do you agree or disagree with my analogy?

 

Anyway, that was enough of me geeking out the literature and the learning I got from my reflection. Will come back with Taiwan trip blog pt 2 and 3, and maybe more of these types of blogs.

 

Carpe Diem!

 

J

201905 Taipei_Day1

Flight: KE 691 ICN -> TPE Departure time 10:35 AM

 

The time has come. (timpani sound)

 

Before I start the blog, a fun fact about me:

I automatically become a light sleeper a night before my flight. This is really strange, considering that I love sleeping so much that I can sleep for 12 hours (but don’t do this too often, definitely not recommended for your health).

Woke up at 5:30 AM. Got to the airport terminal by 06:30. Arrived at the airport at 07:45. Perf. Got a lot of time to explore the airport until the boarding started. Well, this friendly robot decided to take a picture of me, and here is the result….

 

Okay, the quality could be better, but hey, it did its job of making a good memory to cherish. It was a funny encounter because earlier that week in my Chinese class, I watched a tiktok video of robots in public places in China. Being able to apply what I learned in reality always gives me joy, so meeting this airport robot (not sure about its name) came off as serendipity to me. What can I say, I am a nerd..

Thank you, robot. See you next time! lol

An hour after I said goodbye to the robot, I got on the plane bound to Taipei Taoyuan International Airport (TPE). The flight was short (2 hours), and after I got out of the exit, I bought an ezcard (like a transportation card for Taipei and the surrounding areas) to get to Taipei Main station (Warning: This name will be mentioned A LOT throughout my Taipei blog, so be sure to remember this place).

There, I met my Taiwanese friend to go to the Airbnb place in Shilin(near jiantan station, to be exact). When I got there, the host was there preparing everything for me. The funny thing is, she asked if I could take a picture with her because I am Korean and my skin is good. At first, I was confused. If I were a westerner with blue eyes and blonde hair, I’d understand because that’s not a common combination. But me? I didn’t look that different from her (at least I thought so….) Also, I actually thought my skin was deteriorating… Anyway, we took a picture together, and here is the pic of the host and me that my friend took. We laughed for a good 10 minutes over this.

Course 1 – Hike

Soon, we left to hike the famous Xiangsan (象山 – elephant mountain in Chinese). Apparently, the mountain is called “Elephant mountain” because the mountain actually looks like an elephant.

As you can see above, I was both excited and nervous about the hike. Through this hike, I realized how weak I was. Well, it didn’t surprise me that much considering that working out and I aren’t best friends. This hike was a good reminder to move your body more… 5555……

Me getting burned out 🥵🥵

 

But after a million times of panting and sweating, I encountered the view of Taipei.

First, I gasped, then I continued saying “wow”. I just could not take my eyes off of the view. Even though the weather was a bit cloudy, it actually added this gloomy mood which made the view more romantic? What do you think?

Course 2 – Dinner, walking around the shopping mall area, and Shilin night market

We stopped by a hotpot restaurant to recharge. I forgot to take a pic of the food, but I ate a bowl of shabu-shabu with mala sauce. I wanted to find a shop to buy the exact sauce I had there, but sadly, my friend told me that it was a mix of a lot of spices. Result? DID NOT GET THE SAUCE I WANTED. (Sad face)

After we finished eating, we walked around the mall area just to burn some calories. There wasn’t anything special about it other than it was near the famous Taipei 101. About 30 minutes later, we decided to go to Shilin night market. I wasn’t really up for having any more food, but I still wanted to see what a Taiwanese night market looks like. After all, Shilin Night market is one of the most famous night markets in Taipei. As I expected, there were a lot of people in the market. I wasn’t sure if they were all tourists or not, but even though it was a weekday evening, it still was very crowded. To be honest, I didn’t really see why this place was that special……. Until I bought a pair of high-quality black sandals that only cost me $13. $13!!!! Ever since I purchased them, I’ve been wearing them almost every day.

Yes, I was happy to find the sandal of my summer 2019. Despite all the good times I had that day, my legs hurt soooo freaking bad by the time I got back to my airbnb. I checked how much I walked, then I was like, “well, no wonder…”

 

 

**14km = approx. 8.7 miles

It’s always difficult to find the highlight of the day (because when you are travelling, everything can become the highlight), but if I had to choose one, it’d be the picture with the host lady. I don’t know, it’s not something common to experience. You can go to tourist places, hike, or walk around anywhere but it’s not very common to be asked to take a picture with someone.

Anyway, my first day in Taiwan started off pretty well. Will come back with the round 2 soon!

 

J

I disappeared… again

Hey everyone,

Wow, I swore that I would NOT disappear again, but sadly it happened….

It took me quite a while to figure out why I could not keep up with my writing for a loooooong time. I mean, writing gave me this sense of feeling accomplished, happy, and refreshed. Yet for some reason, at some point, blogging felt draining. I don’t know.. sometimes, writing a blog feels like being naked on the internet. And considering that everything is googleable nowadays, I’m always concerned that whatever I write now may stop me from doing anything later on. What if the reader thinks I’m a horrible writer? What if the reader thinks that my English grammar is terrible because I forgot my “a”s and “the”s? The question of “What if” snowballed, and eventually all of my doubts about my writing pushed me away from expressing myself through the written words.

However, I’m realizing that life is waaaay too short to worry about everything. You know, I quit my full-time job without any job lined up about a month ago, and during my break so far I’ve come to a conclusion that I wasted too much time worrying about what others think of me. Obviously, everyone will be interested in other people’s opinion to a certain extent. However, in my case, it was kind of too extreme to the point that my will or desire was after the thoughts / opinions that society had about me.

In addition, I’ve never intensively delved into my thoughts and understand them because shamefully, I’ve been avoiding to do so. Now that I’m given the time, I’m committing myself to really get to know my feeling and thought process, and the only way I can process them is by blogging. I also think that some of my thoughts may help you, not because I’m a wise person, but because you might be reading about something that you can relate to. That way, you know that you are not alone in your journey of life.

So here I am. Re-committing.. I guess, to create more contents in June 2019.

A lot of travelling journal. A lot of tips on different stuff. And a series.

Stay tuned.

 

J

Depression: Post – Depression Lessons

 

Wow, long time no talk! I realized that I never updated you about my life post-depression, although I briefly mentioned that I have been drug free for more than half a year. Today, I want to share about what I learned from my time as a depressed person and how it helped me change my perspective.

 

1. I thought that everyone was better than I was in every way.

I used to have a very low self-confidence for long as I know. Although I was not bullied after I graduated elementary school, insecurity never went away. Once I got into middle school, I started to become very jealous of everyone. I wanted to be smarter than anyone, pretty, skinny like a chopstick, and popular. When people tried to pay compliment to me, I started to doubt their purpose. Why would they praise me when they are smarter, prettier, more popular than I am? Or are they being fake because they want something from me?

At one point, though, I started to see that people meant it when they gave me a compliment. People are busy minding their own business, so the fact that they gave me a compliment meant that they took their time to pay attention to me. They all have problems, just different problems. However, I can guarantee you one thing after talking to so many people that I can’t quantify – EVERYONE DEALS WITH LONELINESS AND ANXIETY, EVEN AS AN ADULT. To me, this was quite shocking. I thought I was the only one who dealt with anger, sadness, and frustration. NOPE. In fact, almost everyone has mentioned to me about how anxious and nervous the person feels about future, finance, career, job, and so forth. This sounds so obvious, but it took me a while to really absorb the fact that EVERYONE HAS A PROBLEM AND IS DIFFERENT, THUS THE IDEA OF “BETTER” THAN SOMEONE IS ACTUALLY INVALID. This realization made me become more compassionate toward people around me – friends, family, and others, and I am a lot happier, knowing that I am uniquely myself and nobody can replace me. Guess what, same goes for you, too. YOU ARE UNIQUE and NOBODY IS BETTER THAN YOU. YOU ARE THE PROTAGONIST OF YOUR LIFE. Remember this.

 

2. The word competition sometimes doesn’t make sense.

 

Almost three years ago, I met a South African girl who worked in one of the BIG 4 accounting firms. We were talking about how I am worried about getting an internship, figuring out my life, blah blah blah. After hearing my concerns, she said, “There will be a right position and a job for you. Why do you worry about that stuff now? Enjoy your time in college because you will miss it”. Now that I am a college grad, I finally understand what she meant. It’s strange to say that I miss college. Yeah, homework sucked. I hated writing essays in my third language or reading long ass pieces of literature that make me feel dumb. I miss the idea of being able to meet up with friends, have genuine conversations, and just go to places together. Personally, there were a lot of good times in college.

I get it, though, college is competitive and your GPA is your life especially if you want to go to grad school. And you know, when you see your friends on Facebook be like “OMG I GOT AN INTERNSHIP/FULL TIME AT GOOGLE OMG I’M SO COOOOOOOOL”, all of a sudden you feel like a total loser. BUT, is it possible to measure how smart and capable someone is just based on one’s GPA or internship? Maybe the student had a mental illness that affected their academic performance. Maybe the student had to work 50 hours/week while going to school. Or maybe the class is so challenging. And yet, a lot of students think that they are not good enough when they get a D in a class or not get one of the most prestigious internships in the world. If you think like this, then listen – YOU ARE NOT. Had I known that the word “competition” or related words can be only used within myself, I would have had a better resume than my current one. How? Because I would have found something that made me happy and give my 200% to something that makes my heart beat. I learned it the hard way, so you, the reader, I hope, learn it the easy way. If you are doing something that has been making your life miserable for a while, then… you might consider running away from it as soon as possible.

3. Humans can only control so much about their future, so be ready for surprises. 

One of my mentors once mentioned the importance of serendipity. She received her PhD in classics to become a professor but soon left the academia. After leaving her professor job, she has worked a tech consultant, web developer, UI/UX designer, and now she is a UX researcher at one of the top companies in Austin. After explaining her career path, she told me to embrace serendipity because she ended up being able to transfer a lot of skills even though they all seem unrelated. Another professional I’ve talked to has advised me to say “yes” to any experience that will help you grow as a person and a professional. As an advertising major, she has worked in IT industry, social media communication, and now she is pursuing a master’s degree in design thinking after finding her passion in sustainability. They were both so right because I realized that now that I am open to different options, I’m less stressed.

I think uncertainty in the future is one of the stress factors that keep a lot of people up at night. The fact that they don’t have control over everything. It’s scary as hell because they can’t prepare anything. Through my depression, I’ve come to accept that there are so much I can control my life. I can control where I apply for jobs, but I can’t control where I get in. Sometimes, I can’t even control where I live. Yes. Humans are that limited. If you switch how you see it, though, it also means that you don’t have to worry about too much stuff. Instead, all we have to worry about is how we are going to improve professionally and personally. Did you read more books? Did you work out more? Did you help more people? We can always find ways to improve ourselves day by day, even if we never get perfect. This is something I really need to work on because I used to be one of those people who want to know what’s about to happen. Once I realized that I actually don’t have control over a lot of things, I’ve been letting my obsessions go.

I know it’s funny to say this, but with all honesty, I’m so thankful that I experienced depression at least once in my lifetime. Of course, I questioned why I had to go through this so many times, but I can see myself changed completely post-depression. In addition, now I can relate to pretty much anyone who is going through mental health problem because I know first hand how terrible it is. One of the biggest changes I’ve encountered in myself is the fact that I don’t take anything for granted. I’m thankful for everything, and seriously, I’ve never been thankful that I’m alive since last December. One of my goals is to dedicate myself to reading thought-provoking books and expressing my thoughts in well-organized written and/or spoken words. Mainly, though, I just want to be happy and create my own life.

Of course, there are still a lot of room for improvement, and there will be times I fail to act what I say. José Mujica, a former president of Uruguay, once said “Vale la pena vivir con intensidad, y te podés caer una, dos, tres, veinte veces, pero recuerda que te podés levantar y volver a empezar.” (It is worth living an intense life, and you can fall one, two, three, twenty times. But remember that you can get up and start again). I think we all need to accept that we are going to make mistakes even if we don’t try, and we can only learn by making mistakes. Lastly, let’s always remember that we deserve to be valued for who we are. I truly wish that you find your value and forte and realize that YOU ARE THE PROTAGONIST OF YOUR OWN LIFE!

 

유학 생활을 성공적으로 마치기 위해 정말 중요한 3가지 점들

안녕하세요,

제가 평소에는 주로 영어로 블로그를 써 왔었는데 이번에는 한국 분들을 위해서 한국어로 블로그를 몇 자 적어보고자 합니다. 한글로 쓰니까 한국 분들께 도움이 될 만한 내용이 뭘까 하다가 유학에 관해서 적어 보기로 했습니다. 저는 올해로 9년차 유학생인데요, 이제 곧 유학을 마치고 한국에 귀국할 예정입니다. 아예 끝난 건 아니지만, 그래도 끝이 다가오니 저의 유학생활을 계속 뒤돌아보게 되더군요.

지난 9년을 뒤돌아 보니 정말 저는 행운아 였습니다. 학구적인 면부터 생활적인 면까지 정말 많은 분들이 도와 주셨고 그래서 제가 꿈꾸던 큰 세계를 볼 수 있었습니다. 하지만 지난 9년간 제가 철저히 지켜온 유학생활 철학들이 있는데요, 혹시 유학을 준비하시는 분들께 도움이 될까 해서 몇 가지 공유해 보도록 하겠습니다. 어쩌면 뻔한 것들일 수도 있지만 그래도 떠나시기 전에 어느정도 숙지하고 가는 것과 아예 모르고 가는 건 큰 차이가 있습니다.

 

자, 그럼 시작해보죠!

 

1. 끼리끼리 문화는 노.

사실 한국처럼 단체생활 문화가 발달된 곳에서는 끼리끼리 문화가 흔합니다. 그러다 보니 외국에서도 같은 그룹에 속해 있는 한국사람들 하고만 다니는 경우를 꽤 봤습니다. 물론 한국인들 끼리 통하니까 편한 건 이해할 수 있습니다. 그런데 외국까지 가서 한국인들 하고만 지낼 거면 왜 굳이 멀리까지 가서 고생을 하나요? 유학하면 나라에 따라 비용이 다르겠지만 어쨌든 한국에서 사는 것보다는 많이 드는게 사실인데, 그 비용이 아깝지 않나요? 저는 절대로 한국 친구를 만나는게 나쁘다고 말하는 게 아닙니다. 그러나 어느 정도 한국 친구, 외국 친구의 비율이 좀 비슷해야 한다고 생각합니다. 외국 친구만 너무 많으면 한국인의 정체성을 잃어버리게 되고, 또 한국 친구만 너무 많으면 그 나라의 문화를 깊게 이해하지 못하게 되니까요.

그러면 외국 친구를 어떻게 사귀느냐? 라는 질문이 나올 수도 있겠죠. 사실 문화가 완전히 다른 친구를 사귄다는 건 쉬운 게 아닙니다. 특히 외국에 처음 나가신 분들은 외국인들과 어떤 식으로 대화를 이끌어 나가야 하는지 굉장히 난감해 하실 수도 있죠. 일단 뭐 학원을 다니는 것도 중요하지만, 그 나라에 유명한 가수나 드라마, 혹은 리얼리티 쇼 한두가지는 알고 가시는 것을 권장 드립니다. 여러분이 그 나라의 문화를 가지고 대화를 이끌려고 하면 상대방은 독자님이 자신의 문화에 관심이 있다는 걸 느끼고 조금씩 마음의 문을 열게 될 겁니다. 여기서 중요한 점은 상대방도 독자님과 같은 인종의 사람을 처음 만난것일수도 있기 때문에 독자님과 같이 긴장되어 있을 수 있다는 것입니다.

2. 한국에 있을 때보다 더 조심.

사실 외국에 가면 한국에는 없는 것들이 많으니까 모든 것이 굉장히 신기합니다. 저 역시도 처음 미국에 왔을 때 모든 것이 신기했고 그 신기한 기분이 한 2년?정도 지속된 거 같습니다. 그런데 외국에 혼자 가시면 독자님이 모르시는 마약이나 한국에서는 합법인데 그 나라에서는 불법인 것들, 아니면 한국에서는 불법인데 외국에서는 합법인 것들이 있을 수 있습니다. 그래서 항상 더 조심하셔야 할 필요가 있습니다. 특히 대마나 코카인 같은 마약은 아예 근처에도 두지 마시기 바랍니다. 다르게 말하면 그런 것이 있을 법한 곳들을 아예 피하시기 바랍니다. 잠시 동안 기분이 좋아질 수는 있지만, 나중에는 여러분 인생이 송두리째로 날아가는 비극을 경험하실 수도 있습니다. 어쩌면 이게 뻔한 말일 수도 있지만 절대로 잊지 마셔야 합니다. 그리고 외국인으로써 여러분이 문제를 일으키신다면 많은 것들이 굉장히 복잡해집니다. 그러므로 항상 한국에 있을 때보다 몇 배는 조심하셔야 합니다. 특히 전반적으로 보수적인 나라에서는 더더욱 법에 저촉되지 않도록 조심하시기 바랍니다.

3. 역인종차별.

어느 나라를 가시던 간에 어느 정도 차별을 당하실 수 있을 겁니다. 가장 흔한 게 서양에서 중국인이라고 한다거나, 눈을 쭉 찢으면서 “ching chong” 이라고 한다거나 굉장히 기분 나쁜 방식으로 인종차별을 합니다. 물론 당시에는 기분이 상하실 수 있지만 다르게 보면 인종차별을 하는 사람은 자신이 무식하다는 것을 광고하고 다니는 거라고 생각하시면 됩니다. 그럴 때는 기분 나쁘게 계속 생각하시기 보다는 ‘얼마나 교육을 못 받았길래 나같은 한국인에게 중국인이라고 부를까.. 한국인과 중국인은 엄연히 다른데..’ 라는 생각을 가지시기 바랍니다. 또 저같은 경우 계속 “너네는 영어만 하지만 내가 영어를 못한다고 해도 난 한국말도 할 줄 알아. 그러니까 니네가 아무리 차별해도 내가 너네보다 더 잘났어”라고 제 자신에게 계속 주문을 외웠습니다. 좀 유치하기는 하지만 제가 어느정도 자신감을 키우는 데 저 주문이 꽤나 도움이 됐습니다. 그래서 영어를 하다가 문법이 틀려도, 단어 사용이 틀려도 “난 한국말도 잘해” 라는 생각이 드니까 쉽게 주눅이 들지 않습니다. 물론 미국뿐만 아니라 다른 나라에 가도 여러분은 어떻게 보면 로컬 사람들보다 훨씬 세계화된 사람들이라는 것을 기억하시고 자부심을 가지셨으면 좋겠습니다. 이미 다 아시겠지만 21세기는 문화 교류 및 무역이 굉장히 활발한 시기입니다. 그러므로 여러분이 얼마나 그 나라의 문화를 알고 그 나라 사람들의 생활 패턴이나 행동을 이해 할 수 있느냐에서 승부가 갈라질 수도 있습니다. 그 나라의 언어를 그냥 하는 것도 중요하지만 삶의 방식을 알면서 언어도 함께 할 수 있는 것과 그냥 언어만 하는 것은 큰 차이기 때문입니다. 그리고 어느 나라 사람들이나 자신의 나라에 대해서 좋게 생각하길 바라기 때문에 외국인한테 호의적으로 대부분 행동합니다. 여러분은 외국으로 떠나심으로써 더 큰 세계에서 놀 수 있는 준비를 하고 계신 겁니다. 그러니 몇몇 사람들의 무식한 말에 너무 오랫동안 속상해 하지 않으셨으면 좋겠습니다.

 

새로운 곳으로 떠난다는 건 신나는 일이기도 하지만, 한편으로는 굉장히 두려운 일이기도 합니다. 그리고 모든 것이 다르다보니 돌발상황도 많이 일어나기도 합니다. 저 또한 많은 돌발 상황들이 있었고, 때로는 계속되는 돌발상황에 지치는 때도 있었습니다. 하지만 여러분이 올바른 목표의식을 가지시고 떠나신다면 유학만큼 보람 있는 경험도 없을 겁니다. 아무쪼록 유학의 목적이 무엇이든지 간에 비용을 많이 들인 만큼 마음껏 누리시다가 더 큰 세계를 보실 수 있는 기회가 되길 바랍니다.

 

As promised….

Last week, I promised that I will be uploading some goals with specific due dates. It took me a while to prioritize what’s urgent (because I am really interested in a lot of stuff!), but better late than never! I realized that I need to find a way to hold myself accountable because fear gets in my way a lot of times. As a result, some of the projects I’ve thought about never happen. One of my 2018 goals is to just do whatever I think instead of just think, as long as it doesn’t hurt the society. I also want to get more criticism and build a thicker skin toward criticism or just a straight up hate comments, because not everyone will like me no matter how much effort I put into my work.

Anyway, here it goes:

Short term goals:

1. Complete one UX work’s description (12/15)
2. Write 5 blogs (12/1; 12/; 12/15; 12/30; 1/1)
3. Redesign my first prototype and call it a version 2 (12/31)
4. Release a restructured hi-fi prototype of a website (12/13)

Long-term goals:
1. Watch 10 Spanish telenovelas and 5 Spanish movies to become more familiar with Hispanic culture
2. Complete description of all of my UX-related work
3. Redesign my other prototypes and update them
4. Master HTML/CSS/Javascript
5. Publish 10 graphic design work I have done (In 3 months)
6. Create my personal logo
7. Get Zumba certification
8. Write travel blogs at least twice a year
9. Complete a half marathon
10. Become more fluent in Spanish (write 5 blogs in Spanish) and get to the intermediate level French by the end of the year
11. Have my own webpage designed by me from the scratch
12. Having an international career; I want to explore different working environments!
13. Become a UX designer who is well-rounded in different industry
14. Go to Paris, Córdoba (Argentina), Mexico City (Mexico), Monterrey (Mexico), Sao Paulo, Rio de Janeiro, Sydney, Milan, Naples, Berlin, Hanoi, Carolina beaches (AHHHH so many destinations!!)

 

It’s well known that the more you remind yourself of your goals, the more motivated and successful you are. But fear always gets us and stops us from getting ahead! By publishing online, I am holding myself accountable to those deadlines. I hope these kinds of baby steps will help me become a doer than just a thinker with tons of ideas but no results.

So..

What are some of your short term and long term goals for the next year? How do you plan on reaching them? What are some of your tangible plans to reach those goals?

Regardless of your goals, let’s stop putting off and start NOW together!

Option B by Sheryl Sandberg and Adam Grant: why is this book so relevant?

Sheryl Sandberg is one of the most well-respected individuals in Silicon Valley. Not only she is a COO of Facebook, one of the most influential companies in the world, but she happens to be one of a few women in a very male-dominant tech world. But her life completely changed when she lost her husband in 2015 when the family is in Mexico for vacation. As a result, she all of a sudden had to find herself a support group and ways to create her new “Option B” life. One thing I really loved about this book was that the book did more than, “oh you need to suck up because you are not the only one who goes through crap in your life”. In fact, the book provided a guide on how to get over the difficult times through specific, real examples of herself and people around her that agreed to share their stories. Another thing that was great about the book was there were a lot of examples and studies of scholars who have dedicated their career to understand human behavior, post-crisis emotion management, and so forth. In addition, she covers other things like how to get over and embrace failure, how to build a growth mindset post-crisis, facing sexual discrimination as a woman.

Why is this book so relevant to me, and can be to you too?

While she discusses other topics in different chapters, the core idea of the book is the importance of self-compassion and self-love throughout the book. Losing a significant other unexpectedly brings a huge change in one’s life, and Sheryl Sandberg confesses that there was a lot of blaming herself for her husband’s sudden death. “What if I were there next to him when he was working out?” “what if….?” “what if…?” She asked a lot of “what if” questions and blamed herself for not being able to stop her loved one from death. However, at one point the continuous questioning doesn’t get her anywhere; instead, she finds herself continuously grieving and her sadness affects her children’s mood. I couldn’t agree more with the importance of self- compassion, and self-love because I realized that when I was unhappy, I would do things that I wouldn’t do if I were happy. Then the negative vibe affects others, and it just becomes an ugly cycle. When I thought about the times when I was so unhappy, it all comes back to the lack of self-compassion. For example, I blamed myself if I failed and how I never will succeed. I wasn’t patient with myself. Instead, I spent time comparing myself to how other folks were better than I was.

But then how do you expect yourself to do well if you don’t believe in yourself, right?

About a week or two after I stopped taking medication, I started this Jimmy Kimmel’s mean tweet inspired activity to start practicing self-compassion.  I wrote all the negative phrases I’ve heard in my life such as “you are fat”, “you are ugly”, “you are dumb”, on 3×5 notecards. If I started feeling bad, I took out one of the cards, read it out loud in an empty room (bc saying it in front of someone sounds kind of strange), and responded verbally to those hateful comments just like how celebrities read their mean tweets out loud and respond to their haters. For example, if I picked up a card that says, “you are fat, and ugly. Why do you exist?”, I would say something like,

“Well, I might not have the model body or face, but that doesn’t mean that I can’t succeed. As long as you are ambitious, willing to hustle, and open, you can create success. I don’t know exactly why I exist, but I exist because there is a reason. Or else, I would have been gone already, right?”

The act of recognizing myself out loud turns out to be more powerful than I expected. After doing it for a while, I found myself slowly building up my self-confidence and becoming more self-compassionate. Of course, that doesn’t mean that I am ALWAYS self-compassionate; there are days that it doesn’t work. But that’s okay because I am a human being.

In addition to the importance of self-compassion, the book talks about how we should embrace failure as a community and an individual. In fact, I think self-compassion and embracing failure go hand in hand because if you are self-compassionate you are more likely to give yourself another chance to try. Or if a community is self-compassionate, they are more likely to succeed. Through various examples from Facebook and other organizations of the world, she accentuates that company that is open and encourages their employees to fail is more likely to succeed. Although they are closely related, I personally find it hard to work on both of them at the same time. While I’m better at being self-compassionate, I can’t say that I have completely embraced the idea of failure. Sure, some people might say that I am making an excuse, which is true to a certain extent, but I think the fear of failure has stopped me from doing a lot of things. Whether it’s applying for a scholarship or a job, a lot of times fear of “not being good enough” stops me from moving on. I’m afraid of making fool of myself in the internet world because publishing a post = tattooing myself online. It’s not like I can erase it and nobody can find my past crappy work. But since it doesn’t get me anywhere, I started to put myself out there more and create an online portfolio, whether it’s good or bad. Although I’ve made some progress by starting to blog more or competing in Design-A-Thon, perfectionism is something that I struggle on a daily basis. The book, in that sense, was a good reminder for me to embrace my failure and build the “just do it” attitude. If I don’t even try, then how am I supposed to know what works and what doesn’t?

So how am I going to hold myself accountable to reach some of my goals, whether it is professional, career-related goals or personal goals? Next week, I am going to talk about some of my short-term goals that I plan on doing in the next three months on my blog with a specific due date for each task. Whether it sucks or not, I realize that by putting my goal in a public space I am forcing myself to actually do it, because if I don’t then I might be seen as someone who is not punctual. Again, as someone who has become hyper-afraid of putting myself out there, this is going to be a huge task, but I hope that this would help me to act more than just think and do nothing about it.

But it doesn’t have to be writing a blog post to push yourself to act more; it can be anything. However, by acting more you are becoming more okay with embracing your shortcomings and setting yourself to succeed in the future.

So, before ending this post, I have a couple of questions for you:

1. How self-compassionate are you right now?
2. If you are not self-compassionate enough, how do you plan on improving it?
3. What are some things that stop you from failing?
4. What are some specific, actionable plan you have to overcome fear of failing?
5. How are you going to hold yourself accountable for the plans you have mentioned on question 4?

 

Thanks always for reading the blog, and I hope, as always, that this blog post was helpful to you!

 

🙂

 

 

Homesickness; how to prepare for it

A couple of my friends have mentioned that they are experiencing homesickness, and previously I’ve heard people expressing their homesickness abroad. Of course, you are going to get homesick when you are abroad, you might say. But thinking that you are going to have homesickness and actually experiencing are two different stories. Trust me, I’ve experienced it way too many times – in China, Argentina, and of course even in America. Today, I am going to write about homesickness abroad and how to deal with it.

Now that I have lived away from my parents for more than a decade and have lived in different countries, I know how to handle with homesickness. Notice my diction here: I KNOW how to handle with homesickness, not my homesickness is GONE. I’m sorry to say, but it’s not going to go away completely. You might think it will never happen to you, but it is likely to happen. In addition, there is no magic answer to how to get over homesickness in one day – it just doesn’t exist. However, there are ways you can prepare yourself for it before you get there.

A lot of homesickness is caused BY unfamiliarity. Thus, familiarize yourself with the country to a certain extent before you get there. I know this is probably a common sense, but surprisingly I haven’t seen that many people being prepared. A lot of people have this attitude of “I can learn there”, which to a certain extent I understand. However, the learning curve will be way too steep if you are not prepared at all, and your homesickness will be a lot more prevalent because you are more overwhelmed. Going abroad means that one needs to possibly change 95% of the way that they live – let me tell you, it’s not like traveling for a short period of time. While one cannot know everything about the destination, knowing some facts handy will definitely determine whether the person is going to be successful or not.

I created a list of things for you to research before you go abroad.

• Phone service – surprisingly, this can cause a lot of headaches. Can attest, thanks to Argentina.
• Housing style – you think that everyone lives in a same type of housing? You probably would want to think twice. Do they use electricity? Gas? Etc.
• Some of the cultural things, whether it’s dance, music, or place to go – Of course, you can find this when you are there, but if you have to live there, you might find yourself hustling to get yourself used to the way that the country works.
• National Hero – Knowing Che Guevara in Argentina helped me get more out of the experience. I mean, anyone loves to talk about their national heroes.. right? Because that shows that you cared enough to somehow learn about their heroes and their contribution in the society. Knowing this will help you understand the society in general as well.
• Slangs – When I knew I wanted to go to America, I actually signed up for myspace (lmao) and chatted with fellas in the US and learned some slang words that I wouldn’t be able to learn in the textbook. Well.. the experience wasn’t always pleasant, but you know at least I learned the slangs and used them. If I don’t know what they meant, I could always google them, no problem. But being aware of their conversational language is very important.
• Clothes – Believe it or not, it’s very important in some cities. If you are moving to a rural area, it probably won’t matter as much. If you are going to a big city (London, Shanghai, Madrid, Paris, Buenos Aires, D.F. etc….), fashion probably is a big deal. You might want to be prepared to dress like them so that you fit into the culture.
• General living cost – When I was going to China, I did have an idea of general living cost. But when I was going to Argentina, I didn’t really know anything. According to tripadvisor, they said it was expensive – but what does expensive really mean? So.. I kind of struggled there. However, I just found this website where you can compare the living cost: https://www.expatistan.com/cost-of-living. I would use this as a reference to figure out how much you need for different categories. In addition, if you want to see how much housing would cost, go to Airbnb and look up monthly housing that is available in your destination (if possible of course).
• Finance related information – I am aware that some countries are kind of strange when it comes to bank-related stuff. For example, it took me probably 5 hours to withdraw only $150 in Ecuador because apparently I needed an Ecuadorian ID card in order to withdraw money in Ecuadorian bank via money transfer app called Xoom. Luckily, I had a friend, so I was able to withdraw money without much problem. If I were alone there, I’d be homeless (Trust me, because I was out of cash.) You might want to be somewhat familiar with how banks work in the country you are going to. You will face confusion anyways, but being completely oblivious and being somewhat oblivious are certainly not the same.

 

But most importantly, even if you are prepared, you are going to feel homesick. Don’t overcommit yourself, or don’t expect yourself to be crazy productive the first year or two. Being abroad is scary, challenging, and stressful, and it will take months to maybe even years to get used to the culture. A good comparison to think of this whole homesickness and the process of assimilation is getting a tattoo. You know when you get a tattoo, it hurts because it involves needles, right? Think of those “needles” as difficulties that you face as you get yourself out of your comfort zone. One day, this place that made you feel uncomfortable will become a permanent part of your body, like your tattoo, except there is actually no way you can erase your memory while there are ways to get your tattoo removed. So if you are reading this and currently experiencing homesickness in any form, LET YOURSELF FEEL HOMESICK. It’s okay to feel that way, and in fact, letting yourself feel it will help you get over it a lot faster. If you keep pretending like everything is okay, it will blow up in a wrong form and you might completely lose control of your emotion. It’s not something that you can avoid, so don’t say, “I wish I were not homesick”, or “I shouldn’t have come here” because you feel homesick. After all, you made a choice to grow yourself, and at one point you will be surprised by how much you have grown as a person after living abroad.

Thanks always for reading, and I hope this blog helped you be prepared for your next exciting but nervewracking journey!

 

 

Why should you study and/or intern abroad?

For a lot of us, fall semester is almost coming to an end, and alas, we need to start planning for our spring semester. Today I wanted to share an option that you might want to consider doing at least once in your college career – studying/interning abroad!

 

I was lucky to intern abroad twice throughout my college career; first in Shenzhen, China, and then Buenos Aires, Argentina (and in America too because my parents live in Seoul and never came to America with me). If you have known me in person, then you probably know by now how passionate I am about studying abroad, learning different languages, and becoming local. I don’t regret any of my study/intern abroad experiences because they have made me a better student and a more mature person. I also hope that you get to experience that too!

 

Here are 4 reasons why you should study/intern abroad. I hope you enjoy!

 

1. You learn a new language, or you have a chance to learn a new language. And you are going to learn some of the slangs, which might be more important than some standard, jargon-y language you might learn in class.

Being abroad is your best opportunity to learn a different language. Although English is a universal language, not everyone speaks English like a native speaker because English is not an official language of the whole world. However, that’s good because that means you get to learn a different language and possibly be able to sound like a native if you try. Most likely, the native speakers will teach you some of the slangs and casual words that they use. Behind their slangs there are interesting cultural facts. For example, when I was in Argentina, my coworkers taught me that they use “che” as a way to call someone. But behind that slang there is a very important cultural fact: Che Guevara was an Argentine revolutionary and physician who was also an important figure during Cuban Revolution. Of course, my Spanish improved significantly after my time in Argentina. Same goes for my experience in China. Because I tried to speak Chinese with natives, my Chinese improved a lot – and I picked up slangs that they use. After being immersed in foreign countries, keeping up with the language gets easier because you know what to look for to keep your interest about your second or third home going. If a cultural joke didn’t make sense to you before, now it does.

There are a lot of multilingual jobs in America. You might end up getting the job solely because you speak the language, or you might end up not getting the job solely because you don’t speak the language. Wherever you go, knowing different languages never hurts.

2. You have a better understanding of different culture, whether it has to do with food, custom, or even business culture.

Same official language doesn’t equal same culture (i.e. Mexico and Argentina, China and Taiwan, US and Canada, etc.), so of course different language doesn’t equal same culture. (Well the latter logic straight up doesn’t make sense). Thus, if you are studying abroad, you are going to face difference almost every day, whether it is food, the way people interact, business, and so forth. You can learn about different country and culture when you are in your home country through books or YouTube videos……….to a certain extent. However, by being immersed in the culture you are actually “tattooing” the culture into your brain system. In other words, the culture will always be a part of you.

Adapting yourself to a different culture is not that different from any life-related things. If you have an experience in conducting a research, you will do better and faster than before because you know what you need to do. The Same idea applies to understanding and adapting to a different culture. Once you have an experience doing it, you will do a better job next time. Again, it is important because you might end up working abroad, and getting some practice to assimilate yourself into a different custom will get you far.

3. You can prove yourself to be independent, and you grow as a person. (Under the condition that you don’t get into trouble)

When you are abroad, you have to assimilate in order to be successful. Of course, you won’t have to become completely like the natives, but you would have to accommodate to a certain extent. Sometimes that process can be uncomfortable because, essentially, you are pushing yourself out of your comfort zone. However, during the process, you learn a lot about yourself such as what you like and don’t like, your moral value, your philosophy, your weaknesses, your fortes, etc. While it is also possible that you can abuse your independence, I find it really hard to mess around because I am completely by myself, which also means that I am fully responsible for myself.

4. You never know when you are going to end up working abroad. If you want to be successful in that country, you might want to practice it when you don’t have much pressure.

When you are an adult, you have waaaaay too many responsibilities you have on your plate. Chance is, you might have someone else that you need to take care of once you get out of college. Even if you don’t, you still have financial stress and performance-related stress that you just can’t ignore. But when you are a student, most likely all you need to do is learn. Once you know how to do it, you are basically using that same know-how to get yourself adapted to another culture!

 

While these pieces of advice are relevant to me, some of these points might not be relevant for you because like I say every time, EVERYONE’S EXPERIENCE IS DIFFERENT. In addition, these are just guides from someone who has lived abroad for a long time. To conclude, I want to emphasize that the success of your life abroad DEPENDS ON YOUR WILL. Also, make sure you know the law (i.e. drugs, etc.), because if you are oblito about laws and do anything illegal, you will get arrested. I don’t think anyone wants that…right?

 

Do you have any tips on how to assimilating to a different culture better? If so, leave me a reply – I’d love to read about it!

 

Joanne